The Day I Accidentally Had My Baby :)

Anika (6 weeks) with cousin, Owen (3 weeks)

So it has taken me almost 2 months to write this post. There are a lot of reasons for that...
Sorry if it is too long or boring, or too much info.

Background:

Thursday, January 7th - I hadn't felt Anika move for a looong time and was very worried.
I called my midwives and was sent in for an ultrasound and non-stress test. The NST looked good,
as did the ultrasound except my fluid level was low. However, the nurses suspected it was misreported.
Long story, but I agree it was probably wrong. We did get an ultrasound picture that ended up
costing us some hundreds of dollars :)

Friday, January 8th - I was sent in for more of the same testing at a different hospital. Before
doing the tests at this hospital, I found out our insurance doesn't cover me at either hospital.
I ended up getting the tests done at a 3rd hospital where I got two more
not-so-expensive ultrasound pictures.

Saturday, January 9th - I get hit hard with laryngitis. I'm sick, tired and stressed.

Tuesday, January 12th - Still sick, I consider not going to my appointment but go anyway
and get to wear a mask. I see my "new" midwife that has rights at the hospital that I now have
to go to. I like her and was glad she decided to transfer to the clinic because
I would have had to start all over if she hadn't.

The Big Day:

Thursday, January 14th - Still sick. I decided to spend the whole day doing nothing but
getting better (sleep, rest, drink water, do nothing). After my morning nap I find a message on
my phone to call the nurse. She tells me that my midwife wants me to go in and get the tests
done again. I thought that was funny since it was so out of the blue and I had just seen my
midwife 2 days before without a hint about getting the tests done again. I almost asked if I
really had to because I was really just wanting to take it easy and get better.

After getting ready, eating lunch, and wishing I was napping again, I drove to the hospital. I tell
the nurse at the desk who I am and why I'm there. It was about 12:30pm. She wondered what
took me so long and said, "If you fluid level is low, they'll take the baby today." I didn't say anything,
but I think my eyes bugged out a little and I thought, "Lady, you are crazy. My fluid level
is fine and there is NO WAY I am having my baby today."

While I wait for my first test, I texted a few family members to ask for prayers just in
case because I was not ready to have my baby. My dad calls and I tell him more about what is
going on and why I'm not ready to have my baby. The tests show that my fluid level is okay and
baby is doing great. The nurse from the desk is just about to unhook me from the NST and let
me go home when she notices that my blood pressure is a little high. She has me stay for 5 more
minutes so she can take it again. It is still high so she calls my midwife and has me stay for
15 more minutes so they can monitor it a little more. She wonders if it is going up because
she is scaring me and tells me to take some deep breaths and try not to worry. I don't
remember being particularly upset or concerned. I don't usually have high blood pressure.

All of the following happened something like this over the next 2-3 hours:
- Nurse: "We're going to keep you for an hour or two and have you do a few more tests."
- I call Nathaniel who is just getting off work, update him, and ask if he wants to come stay
with me. I have 3+ protein in my urine. It means that my kidneys aren't working right.
- Nathaniel arrives about the time that the nurse comes back in and says,
"We're probably going to keep you overnight."
- Me thinking: "This is outrageous." However, I am surprised at how well I handled things.
I didn't really ever freak out. Maybe because things happened too fast or I was in major denial.
- Nurse: "We are going to keep you overnight." More tests.
- Somewhere in here another urine test came back as a 4+ protein. 3+ is really quite bad.
The nurse intermittently remarks, "Wow. I've never seen anyone with 4+ protein in their urine."
- It took several tries in several places from a couple nurses to get the IV in.
OUCH! I had lots of bruises for 2 weeks or more.
- My midwife and the on call doctor are now coming in person to assess the situation instead of
having the nurse call to update them all the time. Nurse: "You might have to have your baby soon."
- Nurse: "You will have to have your baby soon." We discuss options as to whether I
can have it vaginally or if I have to have a C-section. We wait for the doctor.
- Also somewhere in here, it was determined that I had preeclampsia (a.k.a. toxemia)
and that is was escalating a lot really suddenly. I was started on Magnesium Sulfate to
prevent seizures and make my blood pressure go down. It is a muscle relaxant. I was
also at risk for strokes. The medication makes you feel pretty miserable.
- One source refers to toxemia as, "...the most dangerous pregnancy disease for both mother and
baby." Later my midwife tells me that I actually had HELLP Syndrome which is the worst
form of toxemia. My kidneys were beginning to shut down and my liver was involved.
- More craziness and suddenly I don't really have a choice and my C-section is scheduled for 6:30 pm.
- Nathaniel was able to get his brother to come for a quick blessing.
- I'm prepped for the C-section and wheeled down to the OR to get my spinal block. I'm
suppose to relax. I HATE needles. Before I knew better ways of having a child
naturally (like HypnoBirthing), I considered doing it just because I hate needles.
- My arms are straight out in line with my shoulders. My hands are basically strapped down.
(The anesthesiologist puts straps across my palms and tells me to hold them so I know
where to keep my hands; very clever.)
- Nathaniel comes in and sits behind the blue curtain with me.
- The surgery begins. It was the weirdest feeling to have all that tugging and pulling.
It didn't hurt. Because of all the pressure I asked if they break ribs doing this.
I may have been slightly out of it. :)
- Baby is out at 6:57 pm and makes a little cry. I don't see her. Nathaniel doesn't look
for a minute. After forever I get to see (not hold or touch) her for a few seconds while
they are sewing and stapling me back together.

I was pretty miserable and pretty out of it afterward. Mostly due to the magnesium sulfate,
I was too sick so the nurses wouldn't let me go see my baby. Anika's nurses also wouldn't let
her come see me. I didn't get to see her again after the few seconds in the OR for at least 36 hours!!!
That, and the fact that she was premature is what I have the hardest time with. She was growing
just fine, but she had to be in the hospital and will now have to deal with all the possible
side effects of prematurity. Without the least bit of sarcasm, she is more
prone to have problems with EVERYTHING.

The next day my body took a long time to start working again. People were getting pretty
concerned. Sometimes I wondered if I was dying but coudln't tell because of the medication. :)
Later that afternoon things finally started to turn around. Whew!

Despite all of the trials, I generally feel like things were supposed to happen that way
(excpet not being able to see my baby. Next time I will be much more assertive - as will Than -
but I was so out of it!). I feel like my midwife was inspired to make me go do the tests again and
that the nurse made me stay in the hospital. There were a lot of things that had to happen
before all of that too, to even get me to that point. For example, if I hadn't not felt Anika
move I wouldn't have had the tests done. I wouldn't have figured out our insurance had changed.
I wouldn't have had that particular midwife involved. I wouldn't have been in the hospital
that day. I may have gotten a lot more bills our insurance didn't cover. Anika and I may not be
here today. I know that sounds funny, but the situation was very serious. My midwife said,
"Someone was watching out for you. Someone was watching out for your little girl. You're both
lucky to be here." My midwife wasn't even working the day that she had me get the tests
done again. She called into the office and had the nurse send me in.

What about HypnoBirthing? I am still very glad I took the class. I learned so much
that I wouldn't trade. Call me crazy, but I think the relaxation techniques that I was practicing
every day helped to keep me calm in the weeks leading up to this. I feel like it would have
happend sooner, and Anika would have had more issues if I hadn't been as
relaxed. It wasn't until I had been stressed and sick that things really started to escalate.

Funny the ways things seem to not work out, but then they really do. We have been so blessed.