Three Weeks and Almost Home!

Anika is 3 weeks old today! We need to get a picture...

Anika's pediatrician called the nursery this morning, had the nurse review her report,
and decided she could move up to taking 3 out of 4 feedings orally. Then he came to visit
in the afternoon and decided to take out the feeding tube and let her take all of her
feedings on demand. The nurses call us whenever she starts to wake up and show
she is hungry and we rush over to feed her. She can eat as much or as little as
she wants each time, but she HAS to gain weight. If she doesn't, she'll be there longer
and may need to have a feeding tube again if it gets bad enough. We hope and pray
she will eat enough and gain weight. Two good days of this and she gets to
come home!!!!! He is hoping for Sunday or Monday. We will be staying
at the hospital again Friday and Saturday (maybe Sunday).

Thanks for all the prayers!

Not Cool

Her 4:30 feeding went pretty well. The 7:30 wasn't so great.
But, the worst part of it all is that her nurse for the day is the nurse I went
and requested to NOT have. It takes a special person for me to have gone
that far, and I am not happy about her being assigned to Anika again.
I blame the bad 7:30 feeding on her. Real mature, I know.
I have two more to go with her there. I hope I can make it.
Sorry to be rude and negative...

A Good Day

Isn't she adorable? Although the picture just doesn't do her justice.
She loves her hands up by her face when she sleeps, just like her mom.

Anika is over 6lbs now! She has gained about 1lb since birth.
Today she took her whole bottle 3 out of the first 4 feedings, and all but 11 ml the other time.
Nathaniel is there right now for her 4:30 am feeding so I hope it goes well.
I felt really quite happy for most of the day (afternoon and evening).
It helped that I could laugh about Nathaniel's episode last night (see post below).
I went to Kohl's and enjoyed window shopping (which is a good sign), and bought
Anika some journal/photo albums in hopes that it might encourage me to keep up on
things for her. I know, most parents start with good intentions... I'm planning to
keep it simple so that maybe I'll keep it up.

I picked Nathaniel up from work and we decided to go to the Temple
and do initiatory work. I did names for one of the workers and she told me that one
of the sisters I was doing the work for was the last one in her family to get her work done.
The Temple is always nice and the right place to be.
We got pizza for dinner on our way from the Temple to the hospital with
a gift card I had gotten for my birthday. Bonus!
Anika was wide awake and cute as ever when we got to the hospital.
At this feeding she actually took and extra 25% because now she can
bottle feed "ad lib" or something. Good girl!

Here is a picture of our potato bug we mentioned earlier. It is hard to tell what
position she is in, but she just folded over and curled up like a potato bug.

A good day.

Ha Ha, We Just Might Be Losing Our Minds

Last night my alarm went off relatively soon after I had gone to sleep because it was
time for me to get up and pump. It woke Nathaniel up too. He sat up quickly, looking around
confused and anxious. I told him to go back to sleep, but the next thing I know he is
standing up on our bed. He begins to jump and reach toward the ceiling fan in our room
and continues to do it despite my questions and commands. He mumbled about
something on the ceiling fan. Finally he laid down and went back to sleep. It wasn't
until morning that I understood that, to him, Anika was the something on our ceiling fan.
Somehow she had gotten up there and Nathaniel was just a worried Dad trying to
keep his daughter safe. What a good dad! (Maybe a very tired one too!)

I am sort of really glad he did that because it has been some needed comic relief.
I laugh out loud almost every time I think about it. I mean, really, just picture
it and see if you don't laugh. :)

I've had my share of dreams lately too; a lot of them have been about Anika as well.
Some certain friends of ours may be glad to know that we are finally dreaming about our
own kid and haven't had a dream about them being pregnant for quite some time now. :)

Two out of Three

I tried to get a picture of the funny face she makes when we burp her.
I just missed it.

Now we get to feed Anika two times out of every three feedings. This makes for a
more complicated schedule and more trips to the hospital on some days, but we are
VERY glad she is making progress. I try to be positive because I see how much we have
been and are blessed, but I do get discouraged. We had been thinking that after
2 out of 3 we would get to feed her all the time, but we actually have another step
we have to take first. Once she does well with 2/3 then we go to 3/4 before we can
feed her all the time. We were kinda bummed about that. It makes sense,
but it also means she has to stay in the hospital longer...

Here is a picture with her empty bottle that she finished off yesterday.
She even wanted more (but we have to follow Dr's orders),
so we gave her the pacifier. Way to go!

Yesterday was the first 2 out of 3 day, and it wasn't the best. This morning,
however, she took the whole bottle in 20 minutes! She has taken the whole
bottle 3-4x now. We've been working on nursing and hope to continue to do so,
but we've had a lot of issues with it- including my milk supply. I've had LOTS of
issues that I won't get into, but for those of you now and in the future who
may struggle with nursing I suggest you find someone to help you before you give up.
I can give you some good ideas or resources if you need it :)

Luckily I am able to pump enough now to get most of what she needs. But it
comes with a price; I pump 8-10 times a day/night! That is somewhat typical,
but it sure takes a lot out of you.

Yesterday was just a rough day. Anika (or the nurse... it was hard to tell)
accidently pulled her feeding tube out again. She did it a week or so ago as well.
It is soooo sad! This time she had just gotten a new one a few days ago anyway,
but she had to go through it all again. She screams and cries and I want to cry
(sometimes I do). They have to pull the tape off her face; it hurts and leaves a
mark too. They taped the new one on really poorly so they had to put on even
more tape. Not only that, but it was covering part of her nostril, stuck to part
of her lip and pulling at the skin under her eye. So she had to endure even more
tape removal right after having it put on. I don't know why, but they put in a bigger
tube this time and we aren't very happy about it. She is still such a tiny thing
so the tube takes up even more of her nostril. Poor girl :(

This Thursday she will be 3 weeks old! Monday, February 8th is her official
"guess" date (which was most likely 1 1/2 weeks too early). Nathaniel worked a
little during the last two weeks, but he went back to work yesterday. He'll probably
use some of his time off and take a few more days when she comes home, but I'm just
trying not to sit at home crying all day. Don't worry, I'm not doing that bad.
But it is really hard.

Two Weeks

She's awake!

As of yesterday, Anika is two weeks old! We had hoped she wouldn't still be in the hospital :(
but at least she is being taken care of.

If her feedings go well enough today, we can change from giving her 1 in 2 feedings
to 2 in 3. Then she'll have to eat 70% of her oral feedings for two days until we move
to feeding her all the time. Then she has to eat 70% of ALL of her feedings for two
days before she can go home. It seems like it will be forever... especially since it is
likely/possible that she won't progress at that rate and it will take more than
2 days to get the 2 good days.

Here is Anika during her feeding. Does it look like she is eating?
That is her hand up by her face. She likes to do that a lot.

She is gaining weight. At birth she weighed 5lbs 3oz; now she weighs 5lbs 15oz.
At birth she was cute; now she is still cute.
At birth she had cheeks; now her cheeks are getting a little chubby.

We LOVE visiting and being with her, but it is getting REALLY old driving
to the hospital all the time (but at least it is close). We have to "scrub in" up to the
elbow for 5 minutes before we can hold her (but at least we hopefully won't get her sick).
All this scrubbing makes for very dry hands. So, of course, I usually remember to
put lotion on right before we go to the hospital so I can wash it all off right away
(but at least we have lotion). We go in the middle of the night too, and it is
SO cold outside (but at least it isn't as cold as Logan). It seems like several
times a day that I think, "Why can't it be summer?"

Sleeping again. But at least she did eat about 70% of her food first.

Nathaniel has been a trooper and went to her 4:30 am feeding the last
two mornings and did a great job getting her to eat. Who knew feeding a baby
could be so particular and complicated?

We are most grateful for all the help we have received. The meals have been
really yummy, healthy and nice to eat after a long day. Some wonderful people
have even come and helped clean our house! Thanks, Rachel, Corrinn and Brad!
We really have been blessed. I didn't mean to be so negative; we are truly
thankful for our little girl and that she has been as healthy as she is!


I'm still intending to post about the whole birthing experience/adventure.
Maybe I'll get around to it in the next few days...

"It's Getting Better All the Time"

Yesterday we were surprised but pleased when Anika's pediatrician changed her
feeding schedule. Instead of us being able to feed her 1 in 3, it is now 1 in 2 feedings.
She is awake more often and is more ready to eat. Yesterday morning we had a
breakthrough when Than went to give her a bottle in the morning. She took 37 ml!
It isn't a ton, but great for her. She has continued to do well overall. We still don't
know when she can come home. It may be sudden in the next few days, or it may be awhile.
She has to take at least 70% of all her feedings by mouth before she can come home.

Nathaniel was able to get paternity leave after all. His local supervisors worked out a
few things for us and we sure do appreciate it! I'm amazed at how much I can't do.
I am so grateful that he has been able to be with me, take care of me, and spend time
with Anika. We go to the hospital several times a day/night. It is kind of crazy that
we are both just home (except that we're not), and can't even keep up with things here.

Thank you for all the prayers!